Tuesday, September 20, 2011

I Have Free Time??? Really??? Me???

...as stuffed as my calendar seems to be here of late, I seem that have free time, lately.  Really???  Free time???  I can't imagine.  I work 6-8 hours a day, I have a VERY active seven year old.  We have swim lessons, Exerfun classes, Cub Scouts, PTO meetings, school activities, homework, book reports, doctor appointments, and probably half a dozen things I am forgetting.  Granted, my house is nowhere NEAR perfect, we hit the drive-thru a couple nights a week, and I still haven't hit the gym in the mornings...BUT I have managed to find some free time.

You see, I am stepping away from the computer.

No, I am not giving up the computer completely...I am just stepping away.  I LOVE the computer.  I have found some wonderful people with common interests (Disney, anyone?!?!?) and I have been able to catch up with old classmates, co-workers and far-away friends.  I still enjoy this.  I am not going to let it rule my life.

A little over a year ago, Big Daddy let me quit my full-time job.  We had to consider this carefully, as it was a good chunk of our income.  I had worked for my former company for almost eight years, made a decent living and had great benefits.  It was a decision that we did not take lightly.  Of course, it seemed like the job was slowly killing me.  Sounds dramatic, but I had lost zest and zing more than anything.  That is for another blog post!!!  We also had to consider that Little Man was going to full-day Kindergarten and would not be bussed to my parents house after school, as he had when he was in preschool.  (Turns out, he COULD be bussed to my parents house after school...but THAT is for another blog post!!!).  All-in-all, I could quit working full-time, go back to school, and find a way to supplement our income (either by taking care of children in our home or working part-time).  My last day was in late June.  I was in heaven.  I could stay home with Little Man during the summer, take him to the park and the pool and have all sorts of fun in the couple of weeks that we had together before he started Kindergarten.  Yes, we had a great couple of weeks.

Then school started.

Big Daddy was on his summer work schedule, so he was working mornings.  I would get Little Man off to school, and was gung-ho getting the house straightened up, laundry done, and dinner made.

For a couple of weeks.

Then I started "hanging out" on the computer.  Facebook, twitter, online shopping.  Killing time.  Things started slipping.  Depression took over.  It is hard to describe (perhaps another blog post about this?!?!?) but I kept slipping further and further into my depression.  Even after finding my (then) part-time job with the school district, I was depressed.  The computer seemed to help AND hurt me.

But I am breaking free.

I will still catch up with my friends and family, near and far...but I will not allow myself to get sucked in.  I can't. I can't sit on my couch, in front of this laptop and "dream" about the life I want to lead.  I need to live it.

I am faithfully jumping back on (for about the BAZILLIONTH time) FlyLady, who assures me that "progress, not perfection" and that I can do ANYTHING in just 15 minutes.  I will still try to keep all of my "plates" spinning outside of home and work.  I will be able to do this better while my bottom is not stuck on the couch.

What does this mean for the blog???  It means, I should be able to devote more time to it.  It really does help me.  It is not exciting or glamorous, but it helps.  I would like to do product reviews for people just like me.  Busy moms who want the best for their families, not wanting to "cut corners", but knows that any effort is better than no effort at all.  So, I won't be able to throw that roast in the oven tonight and serve Big Daddy and Little Man the most "home-cooked" of home-cooked meals...whatever.  I found a product that allows me to serve a meal, and we can eat together as a family...and I want to share it.  So, I love to shop and am still working on finding bargains (I have a WAY to go on this one) but I want you to know what to spend your hard-earned money on and what to save.  No, I am not big...and I don't get product endorsements.  I am just a Mom who wants to share.

Love to All.


  1. HI! I was reading your profile and see that you struggle with anxiety and depression. I do, too. I finally found a med that helps me completely, but...it also makes me kind of tired and it isn't great for weight. Oh well, seems like you have to give up something to get something good. :) Anyway, I hope you are doing better and have time to blog. :)

  2. ...thanks, Elizabeth...I am doing okay, a lot of changes in my life in the last year have helped for the better...I am still trying to find that "perfect" balance as far as meds/sleep/weight/etc. It has been a journey, for sure!!!